exile in kidville


four months plus
September 9, 2008, 3:18 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized
holy crap, i am a terrible blogger, commenter, and internet friend.  it’s true. 
i’m still reading when i can but am really down for the count when it comes to the interactivity of the blogosphere, and for that i am truly sorry.  you all have been SO supportive of me and i want to return that love.  just wait until i return to work in january — i’ll be a commenting FOOL.

ugh.  january.  i KNOW i shouldn’t complain to those of you in the states about having to return to work after a nine month mat leave (Husband is taking the remaining three months), but i cannot tell you how much i am dreading that day.  how on earth will i be able to leave my baby and go to work?  i simply cannot imagine it.  nor should i be thinking about it yet, i know.  i can’t help it though.  i want to go back at 70% time with every monday and every other friday off (Husband has every other friday off as well so we would stagger them) which means that Audie would only need care three days/week.  i talked with my boss about this before SHE went on parental leave at the end of August, hoping that she would make it happen.  i got an email from her a few weeks ago telling me that she talked to the appropriate people about it and that “if they can make it happen, they will.”  i really hoped for more from her because it’s not a very supportive workplace when it comes to issues like this, though she fully supports me.  i’m rather terrified that they won’t “make it happen” as it feels like a non-negotiable to me.  i don’t want my son in daycare five days a week.  the loss of income will equal out with what we will save in child care, so that is not an issue.  not only am i dreading going back to work, but now i feel like i’m going back walking into a fight… and fight i will. 

we’re now tossing around the idea of relocating to London, Ontario.  anyone out there know anything about London?  from what we know, it’s a lovely little place.  university town.  lots of trees.  monster suburbs to avoid…  and it’s only five hours away from my folks which is FANTASTIC.  my mom could even take the train there.  i LOVE vancouver, i truly do, but my priorities have changed.  we’re bursting at the seams of our tiny crooked house (which i also love), and the thought of buying another house in this RIDICULOUS housing market in Vancouver makes me sick to my stomach.  our mortgage would certainly go way up — PLUS child care costs looming in the future of at LEAST $750/month, perhaps $1,000/month….i just can’t face it.  we’ve been working with a realtor and i’m telling you there is NOTHING out there that is under $700,000 that isn’t a piece of crap.  even the ones that AREN’T a piece of crap are only two bedrooms in the main part of the house with the third/fourth bedroom as part of a rental suite.  it makes me sick to my stomach.  i looked at houses in London online and found a bunch that were GORGEOUS for CHEAP!  i just really don’t think that i can handle buying another house here.  we bought in vancouver four years ago and will make a nice profit when we sell this place.  we could use it as a down payment for a house here and STILL be mortgaged up to our eyeballs OR we could move to a smaller community and live practically MORTGAGE FREE!  okay, maybe not mortgage free, but definitely a life with a small mortgage.  we could both work part time and keep Audie out of day care!  go on family vacations!  it’s a no brainer to me.   we have to stay here for another year but i’m really hoping we can do this.

thanks for all of your suggestions on sleeping.  we’re still not good with a nap schedule….  now we’re struggling to keep him asleep after we put him to bed.  i feel like i can’t complain because he still sleeps through the night…the problem is GETTING there.  from around 8pm – 11:30 or so (depending on the night) he can wake up as many as five times.  it’s trying as i’m the only one who can get him back to sleep — which is the downside of nursing him to sleep, i suppose.  i just haven’t found an alternative that works though.  the no-cry sl33p s0lution just arrived in the mail today so hopefully there will be some useful nuggets in there.   who can say?  by the time we figure this one out there will be something else to challenge us, and we are ready.

i can’t believe he’s four months old.  he had his four month vaccinations today.  i know that vaccinating your child is a controversial topic….we just kind of held our noses and did it.  i love this little guy so much it hurts.  he truly is “captain adorable.”

captain adorable, indeed

captain adorable, indeed

 he’s a giant among men….7.89 kg (17.4 lbs) and 68 cm (almost 27 inches) long…and he’s 19 weeks old today.

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12 Comments so far
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I almost wet myself thinking about a 700K mortgage. We live in one of the nicest burbs in our town , have 2000 sq feet, and pay 1/4 of that.
What a big boy! We have our 4 month visit next week (and ouchy shots) and I’m wondering how big our boy has gotten. He just fits into the 6-9 month clothes.

Comment by mrs spock

What a big boy you have! And so handsome too!
We’re right there with you on the sleeping, except that Thea still hasn’t slept through the night. But now she’s waking up every 2 hours or so and won’t nap hardly at all. Sigh.
I read someplace today that there is a 4 month sleeping regression? If so, we’re right on track with that, since even though she will be five months tomorrow, having been born 4 weeks early, she’s really only 4 in the sleep development world.
Thinking of you lots.

Comment by nikole

He is SO cute! I am a little jealous of the long maternity leave- I only got 8 weeks- but I understand what you’re going through. Luckily I had family to watch Zoe, but going back to work is hard. I cried A LOT! I hope things work out for you so you don’t have to put her in day care all week. Take care and keep us posted!

Comment by Equipoise

OMG. Truly adorable. And truly big. Only 2 pounds lighter than Z at 9 months.
Holy schmoly on the cost of living in Vancouver. I would definitely move if I were you, considering all the pros you listed.

Comment by Furrow

Oh, what an adorable boy.
Moving out of Vancouver sounds like the thing to do. It’s all about quality of life once the small ones take over.

Comment by carlarey

Vancouver is beautiful and all but $700K is pretty ridiculous.
Thanks for your update. Auden is deliciously handsome. What great dark eyes.
Ugh on the sleep front, too. I bought the Dr Sears baby sleep book and I really like what is has to say about parenting your baby to sleep. Their time table of babies and sleep is the most manageable one I’ve read so far. Please post with your thoughts on the new sleep book you have. Will be interested to see what you have to say about it.

Comment by Ms. Planner

The leaving is hard, I get it, this market sucks. It’s great to make your money off, but doing anything else, you’re just so spent here.

Comment by chicklet

Yayyyy! Welcome back!
The housing market Sucks Ass both sides of the Atlantic. I feel your pain.
Good LORD, but your son is sweet. I severely want to sniff his head.

Comment by May

I like the midwest area :) Good luck with that decision.

Comment by Samantha

That’s a great pic! Sounds like you have a lot on your mind, though. Good luck making your decision.
Bea

Comment by Bea

Once again I find myself saying “me too”. About, blogging, going back to work and everything.
I go back in January as well and I keep trying to convince myself that it’s a long way off but the last 4½ months have flown by so I don’t really believe it.
I’m also nursing T to sleep which means in the end it’s me who’s responsible but he does seem to be worse at sleeping at the moment – perhaps there is something to the 4 month regression.
Auden is, of course, absolutely gorgeous – take care my friend.

Comment by Caro

I’ll second Caro, and third you! I just blogged for the first time in two months last night! I have so much to update but no time to get it down after I finish reading!
I don’t go back until March, but my office is regularly reminding me that there is probably work I could do from home when I’m ‘not busy’ (HA HA!) before then.
Why London? Work reasons? I’m on Vancouver Island and it’s wonderful living over here but still being close enough to the Mainland to visit often. Housing prices are much better over here, and the general pace of life is much slower.

Comment by Chili




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