exile in kidville


a gal must want for something…
July 17, 2008, 12:14 am
Filed under: Uncategorized

i miss being pregnant….even with all of the less than fabulous conditions that unattractively latch themselves on with being pregnant, i miss it.  i don’t miss the carpal tunnel, bleeding gums, fatigue, or the fact that i walked slower than any human on the planet has ever transported themselves from point a to b (even calling it walking is a reach), but i miss being pregnant. 

the reason i miss it is perhaps terrible though and i maybe i should be loathe to share it but here it is — i miss having baby auden all to my self.  i miss feeling like we were some sort of invincible duo…him kicking away and me shuffling about.  i just miss it. 

i of course love having him on the outside with me too.  to see him with his dad, to watch him stretch in the morning, to rub his little sleepy eyes, to smile and coo at us…i love every second of it, but i still miss his (big)little body being inside of mine sometimes.

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9 Comments so far
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I was miserable pregnant, but everytime I see a pregnant woman I’m a little jealous. I think maybe it’s because I don’t remember as well as I think I should. It seems so far away.

Comment by Cara

I know what you mean about having your baby all to yourself. Once they get out in the world, so many other people feel like they have a claim on this child, and you are just not quite ready to allow that. I remember how I felt when someone would say “there’s my baby.” Inwardly I would be all offended and thinking, “No this is not your baby, and you need to back off.”

Comment by carlarey

Being as incredibly knocked up as I am right now, I often fantasize about the babies being born. But then I think just how much I’ll miss the kicks, and chasing little limbs across my abdomen with my hands.
I think I get where you’re coming from.
J

Comment by Geohde

Couldn’t agree with you more. I look longingly at pregnant women on the street! As much as I love holding my son on the “outside”, it was really special to have all to myself.

Comment by Ms. C

I was just thinking this yesterday. Must be why I have been having dreams that I’m pregnant again. I miss being alone with Z, but I also miss the closeness I had with my husband during that time. Being a trio is wonderful, but we don’t have those quiet moments of awe and anticipation. Now it’s run, run, run, giggle, giggle, giggle, yawn, yawn, yawn. Great, for sure, but I do miss pregnancy.

Comment by Furrow

Yes, got my first pang of that earlier this week. Oh well – on to bigger and better things.
Bea

Comment by Bea

I miss being pregnant too, if not for the same reasons. There’s something just incredible about the feeling of a person safe inside you.

Comment by May

I miss it too!

Comment by Equipoise

Dood, I’m checkin in from Cambodia, with a rum and coke in hand, which by the way is totally fun to say, but this post I get. I don’t have me no kid yet, but I get the selfishness. I have it with many things, it makes a lot of sense.

Comment by chicklet




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